facing fears

This happened this week. I am not sure how the neighbors feel, but a 30-foot 5th wheel sits in my driveway. I couldn’t be more tickled. My friends have used up all the Cousin Eddie jokes and I laugh with them. I laugh because, well, Cousin Eddie is funny. But I also laugh because I am one step closer to freedom, freedom from payments and the decisions that must be made in order to make sure I meet those payments.

Step one of entering the cave, overcoming fear,  has been taken. And now that it’s done, it is not scary at all. You know the cave I speak of right? It’s in a quote by one of my favorite minds of our time, Joseph Campbell:

“The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek”

I have accepted the fact that the life I want to live is not what is considered “normal.” I have also come to terms with the fact that if I don’t do something drastic to get to the life that is calling me, I will live in an unhappy state. Unfulfilled callings leave us feeling, well, um, unfulfilled. The only thing keeping me from making this happen is fear – fear of the unknown.

The sentence, “I can’t do this because (fill in the blank with a million excuses),” is a powerful sentence that kept me from my calling for years. There will always be excuses as to why I can’t do something. Always. I’ve turned the thought around to help make more adventurous choices with my life. Now I ask, “What is the very worst that could happen?” Things not working out and having to live in an apartment or even my mom’s basement is not the end of the world. Right Mom? (she might read this :) ) It is just another chance to figure things out.

I am not scared of failure anymore. Each failure brings me one step closer to success. Each failure teaches me more than any book and helps me make better, wiser choices. Experience is the very best teacher and I can’t get real experience without failure. I am not experiencing adventure by reading adventurous blogs. I need to get out there and experience it with all my senses! If all of our great minds gave up after their first failure we would still be living in caves. We have made ourselves so damn scared of failure, it’s crazy. The road to success is littered with “failure.” Failure is not a bad word, it means you are one step closer to success. But make damn sure you learn from failure and don’t make the same choices. I have plenty of failures behind me. I have learned much.

So why this 5th wheel in my driveway? Well to keep this short and let you get back to your Friday plans, let me put it this way: I am tired of living my life to make a house payment. This will soon be my home. Adventure will soon be my profession. Handing over the biggest wad of cash I’ve ever had in my hands for this rig was scary. I entered the cave and once inside, it wasn’t scary at all. Each step I take in the face of fear reveals how irrational that fear really is.

Feed Your Monkey!
Eric

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